Archive for the ‘NBA Locks’ Category

NBA Lock of the Day

Thursday, May 19th, 2022

“Do you believe in God,” she seductively whispered in my ear.

“Yes,” I heard myself moan.

The Boston Celtics are +3.5 point underdogs at FTX Arena in Miami, Florida.

Game 1 saw the Heat, -5 favorites, bedazzle the weary, undermanned Celtics by 11 points.

Although not quite “do or die,” it’s close.

Do you believe the Celtics are going to win the series?

If the answer is “yes,” then they’re going to need to steal one in Miami.

To be clear: we don’t care who wins or loses the game. We care about picking the point spread.

For a number of reasons, it’s been a long time since we shared our NBA picks.

Our NBA Lock of the Day?

Boston +3.5 @ Miami

Since it cost a lot to win
And even more to lose
You and me bound to spend some time
Wondering what to choose

Goes to show, you don’t ever know
Watch each card you play and play it slow
Wait until that deal come round
Don’t you let that deal go down, no, no

I’ve been gambling here abouts
For ten good solid years
If I told you all that went down
It would burn off both your ears

Since you poured the wine for me
And tightened up my shoes
I hate to leave you sitting there
Composing lonesome blues

Wait until that deal come round
Don’t you let that deal go down

Wins, losses

Friday, May 3rd, 2019

Image result for sundance kid playing cards

It’s true. You win some and you lose some. Thankfully, the human species is conditioned to move on. Desperate for survival conditioned by instinct.

Same rings true in the gambling environment. We forge on.

Tonight we’re offering ICS’ (in)famous NBA Locks of the Night:

Boston -2 vs Milwaukee

Denver +4 @ Portland

These picks are free. Just don’t be afraid to click our sponsors.

Until next time, we remain in light.

NBA Lock

Thursday, May 2nd, 2019


Tonight’s freebie:

Toronto -1.5 @ Philadelphia.

Absolute, 100% Lock of the Night. Line opened Toronto +1.5 and has moved … all the way to -1.5. Still a bargain. Don’t tell The Wife and bet the mortgage payment. You can thank us in the morning

NBA Locks

Thursday, February 7th, 2019

Degenerate NBA Betting Locks

So this is it?

All that remain are the grifters, swindlers, and degenerates.

The trade deadline has come and gone.

Anthony Davis is still, much to Magic’s dismay, a Pelican.

The NBA remains in disarray.

The East is up for grabs.

Golden State implodes while waiting for KD to calm the f#ck down.

Hindsight is 20-20, but it’s worth mentioning BEFORE tonight’s games: The 6 team parlay pays out 50 to 1.

Bet $500 win $25,000.

Tonight’s NBA Locks/6 Team Guaranteed Parlay:

Minnesota +3 @ Orlando                    L

LA Clippers +7 @ Indiana                     L

Toronto -8.5 @ Atlanta                       W

Boston -8.5 vs LA Lakers                    L

Portland -6 vs San Antonio                  W

Memphis +13.5 @ OKC                      L

Disclaimer: The Chickenhawk’s NBA Locks™ are not for entertainment purposes. They are for making you serious amounts of ca$h. Remember: the more you bet, the more you win.

NBA Betting Can Make You Nuts

Tuesday, February 5th, 2019

Betting the NBA can make you nuttier than a walnut crumb cake.

Many better bettors than us have been brought to their knees by the allure of betting the NBA.

However, all you really have to know is:  no one beats the wise guys. No one.

Common sense and conservative thinking are the NBA handicapper’s poison pills.

It takes a fickle heart, fearless soul, and a rudderless moral compass.

You can handicap until you’re blue in the balls and it won’t help. You can look at team records, home & away, back to backs, east coast, west coast, and injury reports.

You can implement NBA betting formulas, rules, and axioms such as the MVN (Magic Value Number), 3 games in 4 nights, western conference to eastern conference time zones, team name dominance, zig-zagging, or opposites.

Still, you will find yourself with the incredible shrinking NBA betting bank roll.

The answer? Besides the all too obvious: don’t bet the NBA, is to think outside the box and try to stay at least a half step in front of the linesmakers.

Tonight we offer, once again, our TCh (in)famous NBA Locks ™:

Indiana +3 vs LA Lakers                      W

Cleveland +11.5 vs Boston                    W

Charlotte -3.5 vs LA Clippers                 L

Detroit -4  @ NY Knicks                     W

OKC -9.5 vs Orlando                       W

Philadelphia -3 vs Toronto                 L

Disclaimer: The Chickenhawk’s NBA Locks™ are not for entertainment purposes. They are for making you serious amounts of ca$h. Remember: the more you bet, the more you win.

El Hombre Loco

Saturday, April 26th, 2014

The Brooklyn Nets made their move. They gave up picks, riff raff and flim-flam becoming instant, draft-night Championship contenders (15/1).

They not only stole the face of the Boston Celtics (Paul Pierce) they also stole: El Hombre Loco.

In prison there is structure. A hierarchy. Order.

There is the warden, guards, and prisoners.

Prisoners segregate into racial groups:  Latinos, Blacks, Whites, and Asians.

And then there’s the crazy man:  El Hombre Loco.

Heavyweight Champ Sonny Liston, the baddest man on the planet, learned this during his time at the Missouri State Penitentiary.

He feared no man, prisoner or guard, except for the crazy man.

Cassius Clay was Sonny Liston’s crazy man.

The crazy man is unpredictable. He talks to himself, pounds his chest, throws his feces, and attacks the biggest, baddest dude in the joint with a spoon to the eyeballs.

He does knuckle push-ups.

In Stir Crazy, Richard Pryor and Gene Wilder get tossed in the can.

Pryor instructs Wilder that “we bad” and Wilder, unable to pull it off, settles for the crazy man persona.

Kevin Garnett is LeBron James’ El Hombre Loco.

Garnett makes LeBron twitch and tweak.

He makes LeBron uncomfortable.

El Hombre Loco is why the Brooklyn Nets will upset the Heat for the Eastern Conference.

The Brooklyn Nets are our new, favorite team.

Mark Lane Kennedy Center Honors

Friday, April 11th, 2014

The First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States:

“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press, or the right of the people to peaceably assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.” (Ratified on December 15, 1791)

Mark Lane has lived an important life.

Through his life’s actions he gives hope and inspires.

Military veteran, attorney, activist, advocate, politician, investigator, defender, author, Freedom Rider, film maker, Jonestown survivor, and counsel at Wounded Knee.

Over the decades, friends, cohorts, allies, and accomplices include Eleanor Roosevelt, Dick Gregory, Jim Garrison, Jane Fonda, Paul McCartney, and Marlon Brando.

His inadvertent journey into the heart of the JFK assassination darkness authored: Rush to Judgment, Plausible Denial and Last Word: My Indictment of the CIA in the Murder of JFK.

We support the effort to Nominate Mark Lane for 2014 Kennedy Center Honors

A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives.

-Jackie Robinson

I Want My MTV …

Wednesday, April 9th, 2014

They say it’s darkest right before the dawn and in Max’s case it’s true. In 1986 luminary, Jake “The Fizz” Fizzario (RIP) shot across the Las Vegas desert sky intersecting and brightening Max Steingrout’s life.

Together, they turned Las Vegas upside down with “The System,” culminating in Max Steingrout’s wrongful (& illegal) entry into The Black Book in 1991.

The Fizz (RIP) was done. Max was done. “The System” was done and, in Max’s opinion: Las Vegas was done.

The corporate takeover was complete. The last vestiges of Meyer Lansky’s crew were run out of town with Lefty Rosenthal & Co.

TCh NBA Locks ™-

Detroit +6.5 @ Cleveland                           L

Brooklyn -5.5 @ Orlando                               L

Toronto -13 vs Philadelphia                             L

Charlotte +5.5 @ Washington                          W

Atlanta -7.5 vs Boston                             W

Miami +4.5 @ Memphis                                 W

Indiana -2 @ Milwaukee                                     P

Chicago -2.5 @ Minnesota                                   W

New Orleans +6.5 vs Phoenix                               W

Houston -1.5 @ Denver                                    L

Portland -13 vs Sacramento                              L

OKC +3 @ LA Clippers                                    W

Disclaimer: The Chickenhawk’s NBA Locks™ are not for entertainment purposes. They are for making you serious amounts of ca$h. Remember: the more you bet, the more you win.


Tuesday, April 8th, 2014

Like smoke caught in the vortex of a crack pipe, The Fizz ran through the sports book at the center of Caesars Palace. He ran as he always ran when cashing a big bet – hurriedly, unsmiling, head down, as if the other degenerates praise was a storm of rain to get out of. He didn’t tip his cap. Though we thumped, wept, and chanted “We want Fizz” for minutes after he left the casino, he did not come back. A 10 team parlay! The noise for some seconds passed beyond excitement into a kind of immense open anguish, a wailing, a cry to be saved. But immortality is nontransferable. The papers said that the other bettors, and even the pit bosses, begged him to come out for a picture or acknowledgement in some way, but he never had and did not now. Gods do not answer mortals.

In 1989 Jake “The Fizz” Fizzario, the bastard son of a loose gypsy woman, commandeered The $100,000 Caesers Palace Parlay Challenge, winning a 10-team parlay, and became the official: Las Vegas Parlay King.

In 1990, Clark County casinos stopped accepting anything more than 3 team parlays from Fizzario or any known associates.

TCh NBA Locks ™ –
Brooklyn +7 @ Miami                                  W
San Antonio -7 @ Minnesota                                   L
Dallas -7 @ Utah                                       W
OKC -9 @ Sacramento                                   W
Houston -9 @ LA Lakers                                    W
Atlanta -7 vs Detroit                                     L
Disclaimer: The Chickenhawk’s NBA Locks™ are not for entertainment purposes. They are for making you serious amounts of ca$h. Remember: the more you bet, the more you win.


Thursday, March 27th, 2014

Fanzines, followers, friends, tumblejockeys, instagrammers, meth heads, degenerates, and beloved Nana, rumor of our demise have come and gone, we’ve been bought and sold, we’ve quit and crawled back …

Tonight’s TCh (in)Famous NBA Locks ™-

Portland -4.5 @ Atlanta                   W

LA Lakers +3 @ Milwaukee                P

Houston -19.5 vs Philadelphia             W

Dallas +1 vs LA Clippers                    L

Disclaimer: The Chickenhawk’s NBA Locks™ are not for entertainment purposes. They are for making you serious amounts of ca$h. Remember: the more you bet, the more you win.