Archive for the ‘Super Bowl Lock of The Century’ Category

Super Bowl Lock of The Century

Tuesday, January 29th, 2019

Longtime associate, one-time knee breaker, all-time ball breaker, Dick Wheeler, turned to religion in a last ditch effort to hedge his ultimate bet.

“L’Chaim,” he proffered in his most sincere Tony Curtis voice.

During his final days, Dick was a pee-stained shadow of his former self.

There was a time, a lifetime ago, he was a someone. A Las Vegas god working as assistant GM at the Tropicana directly under Lefty Rosenthal.

After making connections, he maneuvered into the loan and used car business. He didn’t sell many cars but had his own jet.

Dick Wheeler spent a lifetime getting the edge on people and pushing them around.

Over the years, we’ve learned not to argue with him. Lately, it’s best not to talk or even acknowledge him. Eventually he goes away agitated and confused.

“Your Kansas City pick was shit.”

For a moment his one eye without a cataract twinkled like a young Cassius Clay, dancing on his toes, unable to be painted into the corner. In full command of his faculties.

We asked him who he likes in the Super Bowl.

In that moment, Cassius Clay turns into an old, mustachioed Muhammad Ali taking an inhumane beating into retirement at the hands of former sparring partner, Larry Holmes.

Dick Wheeler’s eyes glazed over, as if wondering what’s for lunch.

“Follow the money,” he murmurs.

More right than wrong, let’s take a sneak peak at our Super Bowl LIII Lock of The Century.

The line opened with the Rams -1.5 favorites and the money cascaded on New England to the point where they’re now  -2.5 favorites. That’s a crazy 4 point swing. All the money has been being dumped on New England.

In Loving Memory of Dick Wheeler (3/14/1928 – 1/28/2019) RIP, we’re following the money and taking:

New England -2.5 vs LA Rams               W

Disclaimer: The Chickenhawk’s NFL Locks™ are not for entertainment purposes. They are for making you serious amounts of ca$h. Remember: the more you bet, the more you win.